


I AM The First

by Teri



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Dark, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-03-18
Updated: 2003-03-18
Packaged: 2017-11-03 07:44:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/378997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teri/pseuds/Teri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xander is tired of the way he is treated. The truth behind this season's big bad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I AM The First

**Author's Note:**

> Xander POV. – Not my usual Xander fic. - Disclaimer: They aren't mine. I keep wishing, but to no avail. No copyright infringement is intended.

I am the First.

They don't understand, perhaps they never will.

I am the original Scooby. I created the Scoobies.  
 _What did it get me?_

I dragged Angel to save Buffy from the Master.  
 _Did anyone ever notice?_

I stopped the school from blowing-up and opening the Hellmouth in the process.  
 _Would they ever believe me if I told them?_

I was key guy at graduation. Many owe their lives to me.  
 _Did anyone ever say thank you?_

How many patrols had I covered? When Buffy ran away? When Buffy was dead? When she was off with Riley, Spike, Angel, or even Parker?  
 _Was it noticed? Appreciated?_

Willow went postal. Everyone tried to stop her, but who succeeded?  
 _Did any one spare a moment of concern for me?_

Granted their love, admiration, and gratitude are not the reasons I did those things. My reasons are complicated,  
 _but did they need to make me feel that I was beneath them?_

What regard have they ever shown me? Dumping a crazy vampire with me in my apartment. Not this was new, how long had Spike lived in the basement with me? He couldn't bite, so what? There were other ways he could have injured me.  
 _Did they ever consider that? I wouldn't hold my breath?_

They exclude me when it suits them and thrust me into danger for the same reason.  
 _Have they ever cared about me?_

Did anyone try to see my side after my failed wedding? Do they all think I would do that unless I was desperately hurt or scared?  
 _Didn't they have some faith in me?_

Maybe I don't care anymore? Maybe I am tired?

Each of them have had there turns, did their stint at being evil or just running away.  
 _Maybe it is my turn?_

It is funny that not one of them ever asked what I saw; why I didn't have my own conversation with 'Dead People'.  
 _Maybe they just assumed I did?_

I didn't of course.

They think I don't have any powers.

They don't understand. They will soon.

_I am the First._

From Beneath Them I Will Devour.

**Author's Note:**

> I never thought I would write a Xander is the bad guy piece, but I really just couldn't resist. I thought it was time he got a little back! It should be noted that I wrote this with a very high fever. So if you don't like it blame it on the fever and think good thoughts for my recovery. Course if you like it . . .


End file.
